A Checklist For New Mothers
The importance of the postpartum time can not be overstated.
This time of recuperation, transition, learning, and rawness really needs to be supported and held within a safe container.
The concept of postpartum support used to be built in to our communities, but alas today, we must usually pay for the type of support we really need if we don’t have a large network of willing/able/grounded friends and family to do so.
We need support from someone who has been trained in the ways of interacting with and supporting new moms and families. Someone who can come stay overnight and help if need be, even if that means just sitting next to you while you nurse your baby at 2AM. Someone who can help the new mother tend to her body, her mind, her heart, and her soul.
I really do wish this for the world: May all new mothers gather in the support they truly need in order to thrive during this achingly liminal space that is the postpartum window. (And so it is.)
I’ve put together a little self-assessment or checklist for new mothers. This assessment is based on the idea that you as a new mother will have the support you really need in order to be as grounded as you need and with a regulated nervous system so you can have the energy to be able to go through and apply these concepts to your own postpartum healing journey.
When we are stressed or in fight-or-flight, we can’t take care of ourselves or our babies or our families as well as we can -by far- as when we are able to experience nervous system regulation.
If you don’t have enough support to be able to do these things for yourself, please don’t feel any sort of pressure or guilt or shame or stress about this!
If you’re feeling dysregulated, ungrounded, or anxious in the postpartum, the first thing to do is call in more support. Call on your network of people and send out an SOS that you need unwavering support in this time.
Truly. It is 100% reasonable and OK to do this.
You are not an island on your own! You are part of all of us, part of the collective, and part of your community, family network, etc. When you call in support for yourself, you help us ALL by helping yourself to become regulated and able to care for yourself and your new baby in a grounded way.
It really is for the bright future of us all!
[If you haven’t already done so, check out this series of posts about how to prepare for the postpartum during your pregnancy (or before conceiving!]
Alright, so now that that is out of the way, and you have your support lined up (check out this workbook to help get yourself all situated with support DURING your pregnancy so you can skip any feelings of flailing or free-fall in your postpartum time), you might be able to go through this assessment and make sure you’re doing all the things that bring you JOY. This will help you not only in this present moment, but far into the future.
Your menopausal years will thank you for taking care of yourself during your postpartum time. It’s all connected, truly.
Check out the preview below and you can click on the image to download the 2 page PDF for yourself.
I highly recommend printing it out and keeping it on your bedside table during the first three months or so after you’ve given birth.
You deserve to feel good!
You deserve happiness and joy and peace and a gentle transition into motherhood, whether this is your first or your 10th time.
Check out the PDF below, and drop a comment or email me if you have any questions or comments or thoughts that come through :)
In Gratitude & Service,
Ashley
